The Girl in the Pink Shoes

I’m attempting to blog everyday…harder than it seems.

Do you ever have those moments where it’s like your back in elementary school and you want to play with some kids but someone says “You can’t play with us, you’re wearing pink shoes.  Only babies wear pink shoes.”?  What’s worse is you don’t like the pink shoes either, but your mom bought them and think you look cute in them so she forces you to wear them.  Or worse, your mom convinces you they’re cool and you go to school feeling really awesome about these wicked pink new shoes but then the cool kids think pink shoes are for losers.

Most of my life, I’ve been the kid in the pink shoes.  It’s not that I mind being different…still…can’t we all just play together?

Yesterday, Songe told me I had the craziest mind out of anyone she knows.  I took that as some kind of compliment.  Who wouldn’t.  Then, I wondered if maybe it wasn’t intended as one.

I have this tendency to let my thoughts just sort of wander on a topic.  I think I said something like:

I have to slay this demon I call ‘laziness’ and go to the grocery store.  Couldn’t be a hot chick bare in my bed, oh no.  Had to be the cupboards.  All my rotten luck.  I can’t fix the first, but I can fix the second with the exchanging of money.  …I suppose I could actually fix the first with the exchanging of money.  But she wouldn’t have correct change and I’d come away with a not-so-lovely parting gift.  Plus, phrases like ‘You got a car or wanna just use the alley?’ isn’t what I’d call romantic.

I can’t help it.  I really can’t.  I don’t know where it comes from.   Most people have this thing, I call it a “filter”.  Basically, there’s something inside you, a receptor maybe…that when your brain thinks something, the filter says yes/no to letting the thought turn into a spoken comment.  Sometimes the filter fails, and you might say something stupid or offensive.  I was born without a filter.  I say what I’m thinking.  Not always a good thing.

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